This question is asked of us in the counseling center over and over. How does one answer? Well, we are going to give it a try.
Have I ever been drunk? Sure I have. Does that make me an alcoholic? Maybe, but maybe not. How does one decide?
There are some simple things to ask. If I drink too much one night while out with the boys or girls, and feel really bad the next day, what does that mean? It probably means that I abused alcohol last night, right? If I get up, go to work and do not hurt anyone else, it is probably an abuse situation. When does it cross over to addiction?
That happens when I need to have it to perform, feel comfortable doing certain things, when I need it to feel better or when I can’t go a day without it. When I begin to get sick without it is a good sign of addiction, as well.
When alcohol controls who you are, what you do and makes decisions for you, it is probably addiction/alcoholism. When it hurts your family members, when they lie for you, when they are picking you up off the floor day after day, it is probably addiction/alcoholism.
When people speak of a functional alcoholic or nonfunctional alcoholic you can use these same guidelines if you want, but frankly I do not believe that there is such a thing as a functional alcoholic. I think usually those who use this phrase are either simply abusing alcohol or not telling the whole truth about their use.
Take heart. Is your alcohol use, abuse or not? Is it hurting others, or not. Are you using it to help you out or change your feelings about yourself, or not?
Whether we are talking about you, your spouse, a good friend or another family member, ask these questions and be honest. Get help if the answers are not favorable. Don’t be ashamed of it. Asking for help makes you the courageous one.
Alicia Eidson MA, M.F.T.
Renewing Hearts Inc.
Director of Clinical Services
Seminole State College of florida
Professor of Human Sexuality
407-252-1818
